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A road that has the word retirement written on it.

This is your first duty station, and you are still trying to figure things out. You are now a military spouse, but what does that mean and does that mean you have to give up yourself? How can you stay unique as a milspouse? Here are some ideas! 

Don’t give up your hobbies

We live busy lives and sometimes that means we give up our own hobbies to get it all done. Don’t do that. Figure out how to keep doing them. 

Each of us has things we like to do for fun. From reading to hiking to cooking a gourmet meal. Find what makes YOU happy and add that to your regular schedule. 

Remember your dreams

What did YOU want to be when you grow up? How can you make that happen? What’s the plan? 

You may get stationed at some far out places during your spouse’s military career but that doesn’t mean your dreams have to come to an end. What can you do today to work towards them?

Say no to what doesn’t suit you

So you have zero desire to go to a crafting party with the FRG, don’t! Find things that bring you joy, don’t do things that don’t. As much as you are able to.

It’s so easy to say yes to everything even if you really don’t enjoy doing it. Find things that you like to do and people who want to do them with you. You will make friends and enjoy yourself. 

Step out of your comfort zone 

Don’t be afraid to do something that scares you. There is a big difference between saying no to something you don’t like and doing something because it is different. 

Join the local restaurant club at your overseas duty station, take that German class, or go to the workout in the park. 

Explore and get to know new places and you will find yourself getting to know your duty station in a different way. Don’t just stay on base and get bored. See what else is out there.

A blue background with four different types of information.

The truth is, military spouses are not all the same. We have our likes and dislikes. We have our joys and things we want to stay away from. Work to embrace what YOU are into and don’t worry about pleasing everyone else to fit in. This will make for a better milspouse life. 

Julie Provost
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